Sometime we question ourselves or doubt our decisions. Sometime we have to stop and look at the signs that are in front of us, or the signs that are given to us. At times we may not want to see them, hear them, acknowledge them or even accept them. If you really want to know, take yourself out of the equation. Think as if the issue or signs were for another person. Would you tell that other person to make that decision? Sometimes it can be hard to take your own advice.
Instance one: A friend wanted to know if I thought the person she was dating, was really into her or if I thought he cared about her the same way she care about him. Now this can go for a man or a woman. That person will show you how much they are into you by a number of things. That person goes out more with their girls, or with their guys more then you get to see them... you all are probably just kickin' it.
You notice when you tell that other person how you feel and they don't reciprocate the feeling is mutual, that is a sign that this relationship isn't going much further. Prepare to only date or just see that person casually, because you will start to invest feelings that will not give you a return on your investment.
Instance two: A friend started seeing someone that was in the process of going through a separation. The stories all seemed so real and vivid. As the conversations grew, the build up to intimacy was sparked. Once the impact of intimacy happened, the conversations grew shorter and fewer. My friend wondered, if this happened because of the intimacy. I'm thinking, that separation has probably happened more then once and it will probably continue to happen. If there is no paper, without the judges seal on it, its a sign... don't do it.
Instance three: A friend of mine, runs into an old flame. They spark up conversation and reminisce. During the conversation, the mention of the past tryst they shared came up. Of coarse that topic was gently touched on as to possibly happen again, along with other things. Later in the conversation, the mention of being to busy to settle down came up also. I said, I hope you seen the sign in front of you! First, you know this will lead to one thing and one thing only... SEX. You might have a nice time and go out, but the main thing is, its gonna go down! The second thing is, all you will have is a good time and nothing more. In your first conversation, the mention of being to busy to be settled down with a person you can love or care about, is a hint.
If you see the signs up front and you are willing to play by that game, then its all good. As long as you pay attention to the signs. As adults, we have the choice to be busy, not want to settle down and have casual relationships. As long as you go in with your eyes wide open, then no one gets hurt. Don't sugar coat the signs, the signs are there to tell you something ( Stop, Winding road, Slippery When Wet, LOL), to help you make judgement calls. But if you ignore the signs, you might crash.